concerned mama

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Posts by concerned mama

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  16

  question for JW's

  by JohnZogby in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i have a question that hopefully some of you can help answer for me.

  over the past couple years i have become very close friends with a jw.

  he is an awesome friend, and an awesome person.

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  concerned mama

  John,
  All of these posters make good points. At the risk of pulling this thread off topic a bit, I want to point out that you will hear a lot about unconditional love and friendship on this forum. As far as friendship goes that is a good thing, but I really wish my daughter and her bf would break up. They are far too serious for their age, and the cultural differences just create problems, and he would still be all conflicted even if he left his religion. Can you tell it is a long time since I was 15? lol

  So many here have talked about how difficult it was when they left the JW, and some of it had to do with the lack of "outside" friends, and the inabliity to form relationships with worldly people. You obviously care a great deal for this person, so just be a good friend, and someday you may have made a bigger difference in his life than you would have expected.

  Do you know if your friend has been baptised? That may be a turning point in your friendship. There would be a lot more expected of him as far as following the letter of the law, if he was baptised.
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  16

  question for JW's

  by JohnZogby in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i have a question that hopefully some of you can help answer for me.

  over the past couple years i have become very close friends with a jw.

  he is an awesome friend, and an awesome person.

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  2. 
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  concerned mama

  John,
  Yes it does sound similar. My daughter's bf does wish he could see more of her, and some other friends, and will say so. He would sneak around to see more of her, but she tells him not to, as she doesn't want him to get in trouble and her to look bad in his parent's eyes for being the cause of it. Yet, in some ways he accepts his double life as completely normal and doesn't question that most people see their school friends outside of school as well. I guess it is what he has known his whole life.
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  16

  question for JW's

  by JohnZogby in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i have a question that hopefully some of you can help answer for me.

  over the past couple years i have become very close friends with a jw.

  he is an awesome friend, and an awesome person.

  1. 
  2. 
  3. 
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  concerned mama

  Hi John,
  Welcome to the board. I am not JW, either. My teenage daughter has a 15 year old JW boyfriend. He is in a similar situation to your friend. He has JW friends, and school friends. He very rarely sees the school friends (or my daughter, for that matter) outside of school. At school, he is well known, athletic,and well liked but avoids letting anyone know he is Jehovah's Witness, if he can. He makes excuses why he can't do things with other kids, and someone in the know quietly explains why if the asker is puzzled. He isn't very devout, but has strict parents. I would say that he leads a double life, and it is getting more and more stressful for him.

  Just being a good friend is the kindest thing you can do for your friend. If he wants to step away from the JWs, you will be there for him. At this point in time, he may not have the intellectual curiosity or the freedom to look critically at his religion. He may never want to. If he, someday, must end your friendship, so be it, it is his choice and his loss. Sad, but there's not a thing you can do about it.
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  21

  CARROT, EGG, OR COFFEE BEAN

  by Billygoat in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i usually delete these type of emails, but thought it was an interesting analogy and i thought i'd share.... .

  a young woman went to her mother and told her about her life and how things were so hard for her.

  she did not know how she was going to make it and wanted to give up.

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  concerned mama

  I am coffee.
  I've been through tough stuff, and learned that I can handle it. Not that it is easy, but that if I just keep going, I can deal with it.
  Just believing you can handle the bad with the good, gives you a confidence, so that in all liklihood, you will manage.
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  27

  Mothers Day - is it celebrated?

  by scammer68 in

  1. watchtower
  2. beliefs

  can someone pls help.

  is mothers day (& fathers day) celebrated by the jw's?

  if it is not, can you provide a scriptural reason for the decision.

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  concerned mama

  I'm not, not ever was JW, so you have to understand that is the direction I come from.

  The JW teenager I know has fed me the same line about not needing a special time when you HAVE to buy anyone a gift, but that you can do it anytime. So......I asked him when the last time he bought his parents or his brother anything. He thinks he MAY have given his Mom something when he was really little and he has never given his brother anything. His parents buy him things, but he has no idea how to choose a gift himself, or the joy of giving someone something intuitive and special..not necessarily expensive. I wouldn't say he is an extremely selfish kid, yet there is some sort of generosity that is missing in him. He has never been taught to give.

  Mother's Day and Father's Day and Birthdays make us all slow down for a minute and stop and recognise the special people in our lives. Yes, we should all do it all the time, but a day set aside for it, makes sure that it happens.
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  14

  Calgary Girl Brainwashed

  by deddaisy in

  1. watchtower
  2. medical

  the edmonton sun .

  april 14, 2002 sunday, final edition .

  section: editorial/opinion; pg.

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  concerned mama

  She has had excellent treatment, and has responded well. As she is a ward of the provincial government, they have authorized it. She has had chemo and blood, and is doing as well as can be expected from what I understand. I know there is more information in other older posts.

  Her father is the one who is really suffering now as his whole world has collapsed around him and he is heavily in debt with legal bills.
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  14

  Calgary Girl Brainwashed

  by deddaisy in

  1. watchtower
  2. medical

  the edmonton sun .

  april 14, 2002 sunday, final edition .

  section: editorial/opinion; pg.

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  concerned mama

  Thank you for the excellent article. I was asked about this very question yesterday, so the timing is perfect. Unfortunately, the person who asked me is so brainwashed he won't believe it. sigh......
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  22

  JW response to CNN article

  by dubla in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i just showed the (bill bowen) cnn article to my father(active jw), and he started defending the jws before he even finished reading it.

  why are they always so averse to looking at possible flaws?

  its frustrating to see them constantly defending the faith, blindly.

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  concerned mama

  It is the inabliity to question, and mind control that just scares the heck out of me about JWs. When I see examples of it in real life, it truly gives me the shivers.
  Running man, what if it doesn't even get into the brain? How what is obvious to the rest of the world is so wrong to them...how they don't even TRY to think for themselves. Scary, scary.
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  52

  CALLING ALL JWS THAT COME TO THIS BOARD

  by MarchOn in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  dear ex-friends,.

  i have been very curious about a few things and knowing your willingness to help out us "weak" ones i have a couple of questions.. 1. are you allowed as jws to visit boards like these or is a matter of conscience?.

  2.do you tell your fellow brothers and sisters that you come to this board?.

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  concerned mama

  The young JW I know (age 15, and my daughter's boyfriend) is extremely angry at me for reading this site. He seems very angry at me for doing research on JWs at all. He says everyone on this site is a fake. I know he has seen bits and pieces of it, but it is too critical and extreme for him. He seems to be getting more brainwashed than less...which seems kind of odd for a teenager who is living a double life. I find it all really scary.
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  11

  Reining In Children

  by teenyuck in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  now i know what "reining in children" means....i thought it referred to getting them to listen....no, according to the just jw page, it refers to putting them in reins during field service.

  general : field ministry (with children).

  recommend (0 recommendations so far) message 1 of 3 in discussion .

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  concerned mama

  Mulan, I know what you mean. I had a leash for my son when he was about 2 as he would take off in the department stores and have a great time hiding, then get upset when he was lost. He was a VERY active, busy child who didn't want to hold my hand. It was a SAFETY issue, and something I needed till he understood about staying in sight. He prefered the leash to having to hold my hand, or sit on the counter while I paid for merchandise.
  He is now a second year university student and still a wonderful, busy young man, who hates sitting still.